I love that we are moving into an era that is encouraging uniqueness rather than conformity and normalizing the emotional waves that we all experience as human beings…And that no matter how different we appear to be from let’s say Kim Kardashian, we’re actually more similar than we maybe want to be. This realization really became apparent to me while working as a Mental Health Therapist with a diverse group of people from all walks of life. What I learned from my experience was that regardless of our age, income, color, genes, astrology sign or experiences, we all share the common humanity of wanting to feel good and loved, and when we’re short of these necessities, it makes us feel anything but!
What’s so crazy is that even though we decorate our lives with things, people, statuses and/or experiences, stripped from them, we are human, with fears and hopes all stemming from wanting to feel a sense of control in a world that is completely the opposite.
I hope this soothes your eager heart. I hope it makes you take a breath and perhaps realize that you are actually perfect. That your flaws, your thoughts, your shadows and erratic natures are all part of your intricate design. And maybe appearing to “have it all together” is actually super weird and a little woo-woo.
It’s so easy to compare our lives to those of others. Feeling as though we’re not where we want to be, and that life should be better than it already is. That if we try hard enough, the bad days will end, and we’ll reach a state of lingering contentment. But this just isn’t reality. And the truth of the matter is that life is not linear…it’s actually very cyclical. So, with this being said, expect to have bad days. Expect to feel unstable. Expect to not have it “all together all of the time.” IT’S COMPLETELY NORMAL. Understand that resisting and denying your ever-changing nature is what causes the suffering in the first place. One of my biggest fears is losing the person I love. Am I not going to fall in love or deprive myself of getting close to someone in fear that eventually it will come to an end? No, because all beginnings have endings and all endings have beginnings, and if I don’t get with natures program, I’m going to have a pretty miserable time here on Earth. As you can see, we’re pretty much going with the flow as it is. And if we didn’t innately understand the basic truths of life, none of us would be this calm, you get me?
So, how do we deal with the natural processes of life with a little more ease? SELF-COMPASSION. Use self-compassion to soothe your fears. Use it to honor your feelings, whether they’re “good” or “bad”. Use it to surrender to your moods and to forgive your mistakes. Use it to accept your perfectly imperfect natures, everyday. And when you’re feeling less than or insecure, remember that they are too.